Debbie Millman has an ongoing project at PRINT titled “What Matters.” This is an effort to understand the interior life of artists, designers, and creative thinkers. This facet of the project is a request of each invited respondent to answer ten identical questions and submit a nonprofessional photograph.
Alex Daly is the founder of comms+ agency Daly and co-founder and GP of Orchard Street, a seed fund investing in workplace-shaping ideas. Called a “guru,” “whiz,” and “wunderkind” in publications such as Fast Company, Business Insider, and Creative Review, Daly has “an innate understanding of what motivates people.” She is a Forbes 30 Under 30 honoree, the industry’s “Crowdsourceress” (and author of the book of the same name), and a frequent speaker at events for designers, innovators, and big thinkers.
What is the thing you like doing most in the world?
Long dinners with my family.
I recently moved from New York back to my hometown of Miami, and I didn’t realize how much being around my parents—and integrating my own family, husband Hamish, and toddler Jules, into the fold—made me feel so safe and cozy.
We cook, drink wine, talk about work (we are all business owners!), and then hang around after our meal, chatting about anything and everything for a long time.
What is the first memory you have of being creative?
Listening to Nirvana’s Nevermind with my dad.
On weekends, he would blast it on the speakers and we would dance around the house—I really felt like I was inside the music, and the mix of play and creativity made me a very imaginative and emotive kid.
Music follows me everywhere now (just check out my love letter to the playlist).
What is your biggest regret?
Not starting therapy sooner.
How have you gotten over heartbreak?
Growing older and being close to people I love.
The pain of first heartbreak seems indefinite, and when it happens again, you realize it will, at one point, soften or go away. So the maturity of growing older is a part of it, but so is the physicality of time itself.
I also find solace in being intimately attached to friends and family during times of heartbreak. That can be having a friend on speed dial, or an evening watching movies on the couch. My husband once pointed out to me that being around people helps me out of painful moments—some people retreat, but connection helps with my healing process.
What makes you cry?
Certain songs. A heavy end to a movie. When my therapist tells me it’s going to be okay. The realization that something amazing might end.
How long does the pride and joy of accomplishing something last for you?
Not very long!
Usually, when a work project finishes, I get a completion hangover and am ready for the next thing. I am sure that there is a better way to pause and feel a sense of pride, but I am also okay with being someone with no chill.
Do you believe in an afterlife, and if so, what does that look like to you?
Sometimes I really wish that I did, but I think that my view compels me to cherish things more.
My grandmother passed away three months after my son was born, and there was something both so tragic and beautiful about how life works—none of this is forever, and my appreciation has deepened because of it.
Ten years ago there was a stunning article written by Sasha Sagan for The Cut about lessons on mortality she learned from her parents, astronomer Carl Sagan and writer Ann Druyan. When, at a young age, Sasha began to understand death’s permanence, she turned to them for reassurance. Her recollection of their conversation still makes me weepy.
“You are alive right this second. That is an amazing thing,” [my parents] told me. When you consider the nearly infinite number of forks in the road that lead to any single person being born, they said, you must be grateful that you’re you at this very second. Think of the enormous number of potential alternate universes where, for example, your great-great-grandparents never meet and you never come to be. Moreover, you have the pleasure of living on a planet where you have evolved to breathe the air, drink the water, and love the warmth of the closest star. You’re connected to the generations through DNA — and, even farther back, to the universe, because every cell in your body was cooked in the hearts of stars. We are star stuff, my dad famously said, and he made me feel that way.”
What do you hate most about yourself?
I have very little patience :)
What do you love most about yourself?
I think I put out a lot of love into the world, and I like that about myself. Because of this, I have found that many people feel comfortable being open with me—whether it’s sharing a secret, or something they have discovered about themselves and are working out.
It’s also helped me be a more empathic leader, and focus on the value of my company’s culture.
What is your absolute favorite meal?
Spaghetti bolognese, with a crunchy side salad, garlic bread, and a delicious Pinot.